Valar Morghulis
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The Ness/Lucas pairing has finally been realized. Mother fans rejoice.


LadyBolet: Porky had bad OCs when he was 14.
GalenaLarkin: He and Ness made up characters that they played as, and Porky was always making up new powers for his to be 'better' than Ness's character. [It was] Porky's very first Gary Stu.
Onedear: Yes.
GalenaLarkin: Claus became his next Gary Stu, but it didn't go as planned.
LadyBolet: "I'll give him two different colored eyes and superpowers..."
Onedear: AND WINGS!
LadyBolet: Claus is a sparkledog OC and we need to just accept this.



An enemy’s name is what the kids call them.

Then please explain the Ranboob.

I don’t think they can

That is amazing XD and yes I can see Ness coming up with the word and Jeff and Paula being annoyed at it. Because what the hell makes you think “ranboob” when you look at some green swamp creature thing?

(Source: earthboundheadcanons)

posted 5 months ago with 206 notes
#earthbound #ranboob lol #ness #paula #jeff #LOL WTF #art
Porky/Ness Smut Fic

He knew they were coming. Before they arrived in the city, before they entered the building and stepped onto the elevator, he knew they would be there by sunset, and not because he possessed any extraordinary powers of the mind. He was clever, quite intelligent for his age, but he had no psychic sight to tell him how the future would unfold.

Everything happened the way it did because that was how Porky Minch wanted it.

A little smut to brighten your holiday. This is a gift for a kind friend as part of a Secret Santa exchange on the Slums of New Pork. If you want to read the whole thing, you’ll have to visit the forum.

Click here to read it. You must sign in first. If you’re not a member, feel free to register. Many good things await you. Cross over, children! All are welcome!

posted 8 months ago with 4 notes
#My writing #My smut #porky #ness #earthbound

Good find! Long-sleeve “Ness” shirt!

Hi everyone! I was shopping at JCPenney and found this shirt in the men’s section. Perfect for a colder weather Ness cosplay!

No buttons, no pockets, no stupid logos. Just regular blue and yellow stripes. I found it at my store for around $17 on sale (price may vary). Check in the men’s section. The brand is Arizona Jean Co. You can also find the shirt online here but it’s not currently at the sale price.

Use the “find item in store” option, or go check it out at the closest location. Would make a great gift for yourself or another Earthbound fan! Please spread the word!

posted 9 months ago with 101 notes
#ness #earthbound #cosplay #good find #jcpenney


no homo

Nice to see Porky and Ness are staying safe.

(via biyomon)

Nice try

posted 1 year ago with 17 notes
#earthbound #ness #reshuffler #LOL WTF #OMG #kraken

So I named my main characters Porky and Ness in PMD: Gates to Infinity because I made the mistake of not taking it seriously, and then I was stuck with those names through this sobfest of a story. It definitely made for some funny moments, though… wtf is up with that Quagsire

There's a truck parked in the woods. Seems legit
Can Mr. T be my sister?
Butterflies are so fucking metal
Wasted chicken
Meanwhile in Ness's oriental adventures in Onett
Picky's a Mexican!
Testicles with yummy sauce
Porky stop poisoning people with your dick
OMG another testicle!
Frank is a pencil
Pastel Grunge Cavemen
Paula's mom is a fatass dinosaur
Literally every enemy in this game is a testicle
Lardna is chasing a bus
Tony's talking to his Cock
Don't people explode if they get fucked by horses?
I still can't get over the Fleshy Yardstick
Is Vagiygas the name of Giygas's mommy?
I had lots of Jeff today
I don't want Porky dick in my face!
Lardna is a testicle
They're all testicles
He is the leader of the testicles
Monkey ass
Sugar-coated Porky dick
That guy looked like he was kissing the taxi
Jeff's junk attacked me
I outran the soup cans
Porky the zombie prostitute
What would a Jeff-shaped guitar even sound like?
Jeff is dead and Ness is Tony
I declare they all have a hot homo party!
One of Porky's pregnant hoes?
Tony is Jeff's gold at the end of the rainbow
The Sky Runner is powered by fucking